After hundred-thousands of years of human evolution, dating apps have finally become a real thing. It’s an invention they could only dream of in the Stone Age and it made our romantic lives significantly easier. But what if you’re not much of an online person? Ok there are different kinds of apps but the result is always the same: you put yourself out there, defined as being single. It’s like going to a bar alone, wearing a T-shirt with “AVAILABLE” written on it. There’s just nothing subtle about it.
So how did our grandparents do it? And how did our parents? It’s just one generation away but it seems like things changed so dramatically that it’s still hard to follow. Their pond was smaller, agreed! But it’s not like we’re going on a date with someone living on the other side of the globe, just like that. The web is worldwide but we still can’t teleport ourselves. Unless you have enough money to take a plane to go on a date, there’s only one option: sticking to what’s available in your surroundings.
So, when not putting ourselves out there on a dating app… what are the options? (while writing this we realized how old-school dating used to be but just forget we just said that)
Ignore the inner couch potato
One thing is certain. When you stay inside watching Grey’s Anatomy or Game of Thrones every night, you don’t have to whine about the fact that you never meet new people. Let’s stay honest with yourself. Ok, you’re not always in the mood. And hanging at some bar every evening won’t necessarily turn you into a happier person. But making an effort is simply obliged. Because McDreamy, Steamy or whatever Mc won’t just appear at your doorstep. And the Khaleesi doesn’t seem to be the type of girl being interested in a desperate houseman.
Play your own game
In case you didn’t notice, real life flirting is a though game and you’ll have to learn how to play it. But there’s one important rule: always remember who you are. So don’t go all crazy on the acting shizzle because karma can be a real bitch. Definitely when you don’t have a screen to hide behind.
Expansion, expansion, expansion
Another very obvious tip: don’t go to the same places all the time. Humans tend to be creatures of habit and we understand you have a favorite bar. But if you know everyone’s name by heart at the place (including their pets) it’s time for a change of scenery. By that we also mean doing other things. Find a hobby, travel,… be creative!
Getting wasted isn’t always a solution
A lot of people first need quite too many drinks before they have the guts to go talk to someone. When you’re a bit tipsy it might be funny. But nobody finds a drunk attractive. Yes, that counts for both men and women.
What you see is what you get
Know your assets and learn how to use them. Definitely when you lack self-confidence (as many of us do) and when you’re a bit shy. And when someone isn’t interested in your great appearance or personality, just let it be. Always remember that most people aren’t made for each other. And that you’ll eventually find that needle in a haystack if you just look for it hard enough.
The good old body language
Always keep in mind that communication is mostly about body language. And please don’t take this literally. No, you don’t need to throw your boobs into battle by showing an exaggerated amount of cleavage. Or take of your shirt to prove you spent too much time at the gym. Body language is simply about the small conscious or subconscious signals your physical appearance radiates into the world.
Photo credits: Google Images, The Flintstones, Titanic, Sens8