Enfnts Terribles

There’s a shift of the sound between your first mixtape and your upcoming album. What triggered that evolution?

I think just getting burned out on doing the same thing. I go through phases a lot and get bored really easily. I had been making very Y2K, celebrity culture-influenced music for so long that I wanted to do something that was a little more opened up to different genres. I wanted to play around with country, pop-punk, and a lot more directions. That’s probably what inspired my little switch up.

Your single “Throatzilla” is a sex anthem. What does your songwriting routine look like for these spicy songs?

“Throatzilla” was a funny one. I was out to diner with my friend and her boyfriend and he brought up that porn star called Throatzilla. He said that word and I found it such a funny title for a song. I got a beat that Gupi send me and while I was going to bed and listened to it, I typed out this kind of rap to it. The next day, I already went into the studio and recorded the song.

Songwriting can be very different. Sometimes, I just write to beats all by myself, and other times, I’ll be in the studio with producers where we collaborate on the writing. The more explicit ones, I definitely write by myself more because I’m a little bit too embarrassed or afraid to throw those lines out to other people in the room.

You like to have the ropes in your own hands. What attracts you in the idea of doing everything yourself?

As an artist, I feel like the art should come from myself. I would never want to sell an album to someone where the words aren’t heavily written by me or the visuals weren’t my idea. Nowadays, more artists take control over their visuals and the atmosphere they’re creating. I have so many ideas and I don’t like to be told what to do. I want my visuals to look a certain way and want to find the photographers or graphic designers myself, because I want to chose the visual identity of who I am. That just comes from me being a controling virgo.

Each song on Troubled Paradise sounds different. Why did you decide to put so many contrasting songs on it?

The theme of the album starts with this brash and intense party section, which eventually turns into madness. The past two years of my life have been me partying and going crazy, experiencing a breakup, and feelings all these emotions after it. The very end, which hopefully will lead in my next album, is about finding the love you’ve been waiting for. The whole album is about me being bitter, sad, or ghosted by boys, just wanting to party and be self-destructive, use drugs and fight with people. In the end, I find a happy place where I found love and where I am ready to move on to the next chapter.

The opposites come from me and my mood swings. I’m either in a super good or a super bad mood. My personality really shines through on this album just by having these extreme ends. It starts with the song “Self Destruct”, the loudest and angriest track I’ve ever made, and ends with the sweet lovesong ballad I didn’t even know I had in me.

The music video for “Troubled Paradise” is showcasing your new confidence. How would you describe the overall aesthetics of this era?

It’s a little brighter and whimsical. I had the image of the album cover in my brain for so long and wanted to do this Dorothy (of Wizard of Oz) vibe but in a weirder atmosphere. All the visuals that inspired me for this era are basically dreaming sequences and fever-dream visuals that don’t really feel real. That’s exactly the kind of space that I’m in and life never feels real to me. Making music for a living is never a reality, so I wanted that to match. The album has some fairytale themes and I wanted to accentuate that visually.

Looking at the tracklist, we don’t see any collaborations. Is that a specific choice?

Whenever I think of collaborations, it’s always hard for me to place who would fit best on a certain song or who I would want to collaborate with. I also get social anxiety about even asking, because I don’t want to be the person that’s chasing someone down to be on a song of mine when they’re not really into it. I get so much anxiety from rejection. For my debut album, I also wanted my personality to shine through and for it to be my feelings.